Tueday

I was out of there by 10:50am. And I walked the streets of Morwell back to my girl. Figuring enough that she would be still in bed I was welcomed at the door by her mother. Kat was really tired and I knew something was up. She moved from the matress in the lounge to her actual bed. Her and her Mum had been having some serious disputes, put downs (hair colour), false accusations, unreasonable bad attitudes, and no more Im going into for personal sakes obviously. After I got her back to her cheery self again I did another favour for her went down the street and got her ciggarettes. From there I had my "dinner" of Narcos and meat pie and played Bubsy with her, her Mum, and Ashley. Again it was time for to leave, we departed each other's arms and I took my shortcut through the school to the station.

I dont know HOW I did it but I did. I didnt get checked for my ticket again. Lucky me can use it second time around. W00t!

The family was stoked to see my black hair but generally they liked it and will get use to it. Of all the people, who should drop around at 4pm today was my longtime old bogan mate Adam Blackney. Champion! He came around to my place and ended talking to my Mum for an hour. Hilarious. Might be seeing him this week at some stage I hope. Its been yonks. Rang Kat and told her I got home safe and would keep phone on in case she has any more nightmares. I hit the rum a bit, had Nathan and Adrian around to get some music off, watched yet ANOTHER repeat of Buffy, felt the cold, listened to 60's music, organised IE favourites, and blogged. Now for bed.

Monday
My watch neared 3pm. I shook and shook some more. I was still coping from the news and crying to myself about what if this were to happen. Im so damn concerned and scared for Kat's sake. I dont want it to be cancerous as much as the next person. I hate the guy, really do, wish he and Kat had nothing to do with each other but I cried at how cruel life can be to people. I imagined myself in his situation. What a sad goddamn loss. I cried for him. If that conversation ever comes up of people warning me about ex's and their motives, it would be near enough to impossible for someone to understand this situation. I understand their friendship to a degree and quite possibly Kat is the only decent caring person he knows that will give him the support. No wonder I feel so strongly for her. As long as he doesnt carry things too far but Kat has assured me. Stop being paranoid Gerard, you my friend who is reading right now, stop being paranoid too. Everything IS what YOU make it. Im sick to death of everything being slammed with a negative stamp. It doesnt HAVE to be so. Anything can be postive or neutral. "As long as we love each other" Kat said.

I got kicked out to say in such a way as Julia (mother) had some business to attend and plans to do without anyone around or taggin along. Kat didnt want me to go. So here I was trying to get in contact with my Aunty which took time, time that Julia didnt have. She was getting pissed. I hate to be an incovenience and was trying my hardest to get somewhere for me to go and stay the night. Meantime, I walked to my Nan's and ended up finally at my cousins's Alison's flat. Havent seen her for months. She was elated to have me I could see. I really wanted to go back to Katherine as this place was grotty and had its feral degree to it. But still...it sufficed. Just as I was getting myself immersed into "Micallef" her dad (my Uncle John) had buggered off and she wanted to talk. Talk we did and it was good to catch up. Once she went to bed I entertained myself with a showing of the Aussie crime film, "The Hard Word". To my surprise, a scene involving Guy Pearce, Joel Edgerton, and Kim Gyngell running was done on part of my everyday routine to University! Spencer St. Little have I known, Ive been walking in the steps of Guy Pearce. Sad as it maybe it highlighted my dismal night. To my happy surprise Kat cooked dinner for me not realising I woudnt be there and I left my wallet behind. Guess Ill have to go there again tomorrow...I thought the fact that we were on either side of the hill to each other was rather lame with thanks to her mother. She had another bad dream and I wasnt there to comfort her. Mind you my night closed with sleeping on a couch bed thingy with rocks in the pillow case which were somehow comfortable.

Sunday

Woke up late but not as late. I was a little shitty for Kat wasnt in the bed next to me. I remember her getting up earlier in the morning and most likely, walked into her mother's bedroom and spent hoped into that bed. Sure enough......but of course stupid old me being too conclusional and conspiring it was too cold in the lounge where our bed was. Thanks for leaving me though to be eaten by the cold Gippsland air I told her. But anyway....

They really didnt want to go in such shitty weather that there was that day but I pushed them along. They knew they wanted too and I knew it would do them a whole lot of good...a good swim at the Churchill pool.
Damn it was good. Kat and I had our fun in the water while her mother wasnt watching...and sometimes when she was. I did my diving and gave myself a chronic headspin and fizzling nose. What bliss.

It was one of those days where for certain mothers and daughters they just dont get along. I kept my nose well out of it.

That night dinner needed to be ready by 8. But before Kat was too cook it, I had to clean all of the dishes before hand not to mention after as well. Meanwhile we got caught up playing Bubsy and before we knew it, it was 7:30. I quickly went off and did my best at doing the dishes. The always dishevelled looking Bob comes into the kitchen stating it was too late for him to have dinner, that he needed to get back to his shift. The sartay chicken was good and fulfilling but I was a distracted by Kat's quietness. "She's just tired. She said it herself" I told myself. Later we watched "Flying High II" DVD...very funny movie. Great entertainment value. But naturally like any other night, her ex rang again. GRRRR "Try and let it be Gerard" But alas, I had to say something. It might have been the night before when I asked if I could talk to him as well as her this coming Friday night for my own peace at mind. She told me it was no good as he wont listen to me and more or less tell me to buzz off. I couldnt understand and still cant really....cant this fucktard be diplomatic or considerate at least? I asked this of Kat and she told me how he wants nothing to do with me after he heard about my cousin's and some of her previous gribes about me. ie Not telling her about my possible holidays to Mildura until a few days later it came up. Same seems to go for her friend Damien. What the fuck had she been saying about me to her friends? It sounded like it was negative. Is that all she says to them, gribes and rants? I know it's not the case, I could see she was bordering on one of "those" moods. Im really starting to hate this guy alot. Just as things seem to be good for Katherine he comes along with this predicament. It gives me so many mixed emotions, Im so angry with him but I can understand to but which he would stop sharing his problems with her, she has enough without any more hassles. I really dont know how things will turn out. As for the other night, I told her I wanted to discuss it over with her first before I went off nilly-willy and did my own thing without her knowing. Least that was understood.
What I didnt know, is that he is her best friend. I must not come between that friendship for my own sake. I should stop being paranoid, trust what has been said to me, and leave it alone. Easier said than done sometimes.
But tonight it was more than this. I left the dishes too late to do, by about 3 hours. My mistake. I didnt make coffee's for her mother and Bob the other night, they didnt seem fussed at the time. My fucking God, didnt know it was a serious business. Plus it felt like everything I tried to do right, was nit-picked, there was something wrong with it. My wet towel couldnt be placed on the floor in front of the heater because chloride is flammable (I had a shower so not like there was massive amounts ready to go up in flames on the towel), then the fact it made the wet floor. "Stop trying Gerard, nothing will work. Let it be" I thought and said.

Meanwhile the time passed and we had our backs to each other. Little I knew that we would go to sleep in each other's arms and be woken up 2 hrs later with her clutching onto me from having a dream where we had a serious arguement and I was cheating with another girl... Bloody animals wouldnt settle down AGAIN and kept disturbing everyone not to mention complete state of full waking consciousness. Kat got up and left me. She was sleeping in her mother's bed. Fine then...I will woory only about myself. I felt sick and I couldnt sleep. Thank God I had the Nintendo. 3:30am and it was time I try and get some sleep, I didnt want another late night\day. Not long I had gone to bed Kat came back comforting me saying she has alot on her mind epecially something Craig (Claig that damn ex of hers) asked her. I guessed a million things but it was none of them. She couldnt tell me for I might crack. In a nutshell, Craig has a missing disc from his back. He is nearing being wheel-chair bound. Doctors dont know what happen to the missing disc. This has affected his hip and caused a growth. It maybe cancerous. If so he will need treatment hence his inability to have kids. At the present moment enter Kat who was asked to carry his genes and have a kid for him. The next 5 days should show which way this will go, what her decision is, and how that situation and us as a couple will progress into the future.


Saturday
The clock struck somewhere around 3-4pm as I awoke. Why such late arisial? It most likely would be over-tiredness, having bloody restless pets interrupt your sleep and just one of those nights where nothing in the house seems settled.
By the time I had a shower, it was time for our standard Cole's run. Picture us musing over the hair dyes in the aisle. Here I was thinking about going for a chocolate-y brown with blonder streaks while Kat would go for dark bungundy but hey we both like black and hey Presto! Before we knew it we were in the bathroom dying our hair. She did mine then hers. How black can black go for God's sake?! I wasn't sure if this was such a good idea. Excitement and terror went through me...I coudn't believe what I was doing.
And here we were. We had matching black hair. We both love it on each other and think it looks sexy. It is funny to see how long it takes for people to pick up on the fact there is something different about either my appearance or Kat's.
As for the night's festivites, if it wasnt "Bubsy" on SNES then we went to the "FunShed" behind Macca's.

Good point: It was all free and gave us something to do. Bad point: Ran by Christians but not of the garden variety kind. The less aggressive, self-mindful sort.

After 3 games of pool it was dinnertime at your trusty convenient Macca's restaurant. Opps....bad point of tonight was....walking home up and down the other side of a friggin hill that nearly gave us back aches. (Not literally)*
The night ended with us playing SNES, the ever shitty SNES game "Road Runner" (Do not, I repeat, DO NOT play this game or purchase it) and various other bits and pieces.

Friday

My venture into the city proved quite frustrating. Apart from the incompetent train driver who drove slow as a snail on beer, I had to back to Uni on the first day of my holidays to sort out my friggin concession.
First thing was first.

Went to Angus & Robertson and found myself a nice card for my babe to go with the artificial yellow rose. (Yes artificial, so like you know....it kinda lasts). Then to the shithouse InfoVictoria on Collins. All I wanted was information on free\inexpensive camping spots around Victoria, namely the coastal\mountainous regions. "Soory, we sell books on that sorta thing though." I went to get a map that looked promising on offering something worthwhile......EIGHT BUCKS! Out I went.
Did the concession paperwork at Uni then went to Spencer St station to buy it. EIGHTY BUCKS! I was fuming.....if the public transport can squelch every bit of silver, gold, and plastic out of you, rest assure, they will. You have been warned.

Other than that, I missed the Pakenham train and it looked like I will be getting to Morwell late. Shite.

As usual, I wasnt going to get away with using an outward bound Melbourne train without any annoyances. Enter a LARGE group of chatty adolescent school girls in front of me. Then I had the hassle of trying to get some sort of concession worked out at Pakenham station with my mother, or at least some resemblance of concession. I was nearing that desperate point. "Soory you cant buy a yearly statewide concession card until two weeks from now." Grrr...

Eventually I saw myself arrive at Morwell, happy at the fact I had finally got there and somehow blended into my Vline seat surroundings scoring me a ticket not marked my the inspector. Walked those few km's to Katherine's place. It felt like it had been months since we had seen each other.

We watched "Bone Collector" DVD and other various TV segments that night. She was so happy with her artificial rose and card. "...Heaven's angels were on high."

Sex was great and so was the pizza. As we went to bed on the air mattress in the loungeroom, I couldnt help but feel so relieved that this w\end looked promising. Least thats what I thought.